i'm not going to lie.....I have a huge crush on Cecily Brown, I want to end up with an artist like this....SHES SO COOOOOOOL. Ummmm yeah.....white dress shirt and suspenders anyone? jeeeezka meeeezka. You bet I'm gonna go home after work and pull out my only white dress shirt and small suspenders. I mean seriously, can you say "no thank you" to this????!!!! How come D'ann can't recommend someone like this? I mean there's figures and everything within all this abstraction. WHY DOESN'T UNDERSTAND THAT THINGS LIKE THIS ARE POSSIBLE!!!! She was in Vitamin P right? I don't look at that book too often, but there's this book out from the Saatchi gallery and she's in it as well.
I'm going to paint like this.............what the fuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!!!!!

boooo hooooo hooooo

so yesterday definitely sucked a big one......bad news bears left and right........jk...........all in time I suppose..........but all I have to say is.

this isn't over just yet you know.......ohhh no mam', there's no way I'd give up on everything that easily.....not without a fight.

..........(time to bring out the "machos" once again......what are machos you ask......these are macohs, minus the chest pads, that's just plain gay dude.....they might as well make eye ball pads. The head gear is also quite gay as well.....but everything else is totally EXTREME indie hipster)

i'll be walking out of work shortly.

work work work. all day work. boooooooring. I always try to find new frog eyes stuff though, it's a band that you can never always seem to catch up with these days. There was a funny interview on Daytrotter about Mercer living with Krug. "he rented "Titanic", and listened to Ligeti all the time". Something like that. I found a Ligeti cd at work by the way. I'm afraid to listen to it.

could it be a joke? or is Ligeti brilliant or something.

I could go for some pasta right now, maybe pizza actually...............actually......18 pizza pockets. Vicki has been cutting paper for the past 40 minutes straight. This of course is of no importance but it's making my foot tap. Kinda like how when I'm at a traffic light and I have my left turn indicator on...........I always have the tendency to make my own song out of it.

It's Dancer in the Dark gone all wrong.

Music students please go away........as for the old man who walks 1.5 miles an hour, please come here more often and tell me stories. Old people are way too much fun. This guy, who seriously looked like this.....

came up to me today and asked what year I was. I say, "oh.....I've been here for five years". To which he says, "Oooooooooooooohhhh (pause) OOOOOOOOOOhhhhh heheheheheh" no reply after that. just giggles and long whole note vowels coming out of his 80 some year old vocal chords. You know, I could go on with the story, but..........it's more of a joke you' d hear at your grandmas while underneath an afghan....it's not that funny really, just way too cute.

The best part of our conversation was when he gave me all his information so I could help him do a "recall on checked out materials", to which he goes, "now......sigh........I might need those back (referring to his license and library card) because sometimes......I forget my name.......sigh....and my telephone number."

WHAT DO I SAY BACK TO HIM? OH I DON'T KNOW.

"ohhhh it's cool, I do that all the time" to which replies again, "oooooooooooohhhh (pause) OOOhhhhhhh HEHEHEHEHEHHEEHEH". he's so loud that even the guy waiting at the desk for the past 5 minutes begins to crack up.

I see this guy every Friday around 3 o clock. There was one day when, he came up at 3:20, left around 3:30, and as I'm walking out of work around 4:10, I see him half way through the backside of the library in the parking lot. I think it took him over 30 minutes to walk out the building. No joke, this guy is adorable. he usually comes in with his wife all the time, but I bet you she got sick of walking all slow with him so she probably just sent him out to the library today. I hope I can be like him someday.

how about a long email?

well, no time to bitch and moan. It's just been one of those days. I feel like I'm spreading myself way too thin in every aspect right now. I haven't read since Tuesday and although that's not that long ago, it seems like I haven't read for an entire month. Especially when I know in the back of my mind, "this is the time to read, it's so important for you".
So in a sense I feel like I'm letting myself down.

weird, conspiracy things happened this morning. I think I was getting such an art high this past month that I forgot to always think about the fact that nothing else in the world matters than what you look like in His eyes. Maybe that's why I felt so small today. Has my confidence exploded, I feel a reality check coming on soon.

Okay, I'm fine, you know what?.....all of this is just a test. Art always knows how to get you down when you think you have it figured out. And Allah knows all your weaknesses. So put that together and this is why I'm in the mood I am right now. Once I get a goodnight sleep, I'll be back to normal, laughing at anything that moves. Sorry for such a Debby Downer on Hormonal Pills today.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Well my friend, it has been a while hasn't it. It's hard to find time, you know what, erase that......instead of "it's hard to find time" I should just say, "so much has been happening lately that I apologize for not keeping you updated." I've gone back to the whole, "writing in a journal" type deal. It's nice...............it's niiiiiiiice, funny how these days everything is made in aims of making it easier for everyone to function. Online journals, online television, ONLINE DATING, online stalking (i.e. facebook).

In lecture today Danny brought up a story about this famous art critic who wrote about how when art galleries, and famous works of art began being photographed for publishing, that this was the destruction of any type of aura produced by the piece of work. So I suppose convienience is capable of killing the aura. Sad bastard yes, but how fun are hand written letters.

Especially the ones you keep and tuck away in your desk drawer. Indeed these are the best types of letters. Secret envelopes that are the little doorways in life you use in order to escape into another world that only you and your sender share. Substance, it never can be deleted, or mishandled by any piece of modern day technology, of course unless there was a fire caused by let's say, one of those little motored whiskers from Ikea. You know, the kind that foams hot chocolate.

I thought about writing all of this in pen, taking a picture, then posting the picture online, but then again, why be difficult right? Do we just go with the flow? or do we in return be difficult and try to resort to ways that modern day society deems as unconventional.
fuck it, i'm down for hand written letters.

so school has begun. full force I might add. The week has almost ended, and what's that?............yeah....I've already spent a morning at the woodshop. By tomorrow this time, make that two mornings at the woodshop. Also, what the fuck is going on with the future generations. I remember once when I thought to myself, "HOLY SHIT!!! WHY ARE ALL THE YOUNGER KIDS SO MUCH TALLER THAN ME!!!!"
now this year!???? midgets everywhere. Little kids with rosey cheeks I kid you not. The kind of kid that you know was never forced to endure the infamous "banana & condom" demonstration, or should I say routine.
What happened when Jim tried to show me this you ask? SNAP!!!!!!...............I kid you not. To which he replies, "you get the picture right?"

so anyway, all in all, I feel old this year. Having a birthday just a week ago doesn't really help either. I can already feel the skin falling off my bones. jk

So............time for you to update, because I've written all this wonderful information for you, and now I want to be bidazzled. Post pictures of ribbon dancers, anything! just something.