my grandma quit eating pork.

So.....today is one of those days where everything in the first hour of waking up contributes to the next 12 hours of thought. After reading a passage from a book that holds dear to the idea of family being first, I realized that even though I have such a distant family, I needed to make the first step.
I haven't talked to my grandma in over a year and a half....probably more, since I think the last time I talked to her was when I first moved into my house on Eureka. Ever since I was young I have known her as "Nona". I never really call her Grandma for some reason. I'd always like to think that "Nona" was the secret code name she told me to call her when I was two, but I think everyone in the family calls her that.....I still am going with the theory that her name was only revealed to me, because I was usually her favorite grandson......why?.....because I was the fat kid who always stood below her ankles tugging for a second and third taste test. I still remember how her wooden spoons felt on the tip of my tounge every time she handed me down a sample.

Her real name is "Feliccia", and I know I probably spelled that wrong. That's my dad's middle name. And that's my great grandfathers last name......something like that. She comes from a town in Italy called Campobasso. Which when I asked her I wrote something that more so resembled "camp-lazlo". It's a town that's located right between Naples and Rome. But since whenever she refers to the backcountries she always says "Napoli y Roma". To which I think...."okay....Naopleon's ship....and a tomato".



So I called her today......this morning.....about 5 minutes after waking up to be exact. My family history is now a current version of Gilligans Island. Everyone's just fucking weird, and it seems like we're all waiting for someone to rescue the dignity of this whole family. So why does it feel like I'm that person?

Nona mentioned that Sonya, my oldest cousin on my Dad's side, had a baby boy. WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN??! Since his father is Sicillian....of course the name for a child is usually derived from the childs grandfather...so what was this kids name you ask? Ohhhh it's not even a big deal.......the childs name is ........Antonio.

what a great name.....I told nona "I approve of that name Nona" to which she chuckled in an old grandma way that all grandma's laugh in. The kind of desperate laugh that says "ohhh Anthony.....you remind me of what it was like to laugh". Which is so heart warming, but also makes you want to take them away from the boring Aunt's house, and splurge them with a cruise across the world back to the motherland just so they could see the house they grew up in.

All in all, I think she is doing fine. I'm not sure though. She's had back surgury, and three weeks ago just had foot surgury. When I asked her how she was doing, she literally replied, "eghhhhhhh.....not so good.....I've been stuck in this dumb chair for three weeks now because I had foot surgury." talk about a sinking heart.
Wouldn't it be nice when you ask them how they are doing to hear, "GREAT! I just got back from playing beach vollyball, and I'm about to go snorkling after I fix myself a double decker sandwhich.........(in detroit grandma?)"

To my surprise though, my grandma gave up pork......SERIOUSLY!??? I almost blurted out "ohhh DUDE....BRO I"M DOING THAT TOO!" her reason were that in the Old Testiment they never ate pork. so....yeah......that would happen.....I wouldn't talk to my grandma in over a year and at the same time we just give up pork without even letting each other know. and by the way....turkey bacon is so much better than the real deal....no joke. Being a fat kid and all, my aunt would make me turkey bacon by the plate when I was little.

Anyway, sorry if this wasn't a page turner kinda like my last post.